Sometimes after a relationship ends, what we miss most is not simply the other person. We may miss how we felt with them — desired, interesting, confident or alive. Inspired by a video from my friend and colleague Julie, I explore the grief of losing both a relationship and a version of yourself.

The first year after losing someone can bring painful reminders, anniversaries and emotional milestones. This article explores grief, bereavement and gentle ways to navigate the “year of firsts” after loss.